Fyodor Dostoevsky, Notes From The Underground
scorpio ° ☾ °☆ ¸. ●
Conversation between some chatty 60-something ladies behind us in the movie theater after Dial M for Murder:
Lady 1: “I like that Ray Milland.”
Lady 2: “Who was the girl?”
Lady 1: “I don’t know, but she was pretty!”
Cristi and I exchanged a quizzical look. How can someone identify Ray Milland, but not Grace Kelly?
That would be like “I love that show with Desi Arnaz, but who was the redhead again?”
Anonymous asked: i find that i often confuse having to pee with being aroused. ill think im aroused but in reality i just need to go to the bathroom. also, i find the only way i can masturbate and actually feel good is by rubbing myself through my underwear. are both these things okay/normal? is there something i should be worried about?
There is a lot of confusion/correlation between those two sensations. It’s not at all unusual to have both of those sensations (feeling like you need to pee and like you’re aroused) at the same time, or even to switch the feelings. That’s because of basic anatomy.
Here is the outside of the vulva - see where the urethral opening is? That’s where you pee out of. It’s a very small opening that is right above the vaginal canal.
Next, we’ll see it from the side.
See that little purple spot labeled “Skene’s glands”? Those glands are right in the urethral sponge. If you insert a finger into the vagina up to the second knuckle (or about 2 inches), you’ll fee some thing soft and spongy on the top of the vaginal canal (the side closest to your belly button). The urethral sponge is tissue that surrounds the urethra. As well as doing other things, the sponge swells up during arousal, effectively sealing off the urethra and preventing you from peeing during sex. However, ever since potty training we have been taught to be super well attuned to our bodies to make sure that we don’t just pee our pants all the time. This means that we notice the sensations of fullness in and around our urethras, and this is one of those situations in which a swollen urethral sponge makes it feel like you need to pee.
This is also the location of the “g-spot”.
For some people, stimulating the g-spot can be very arousing and lead to orgasm, but for others it can just make them feel like they need to pee.
So to recap - in that one section we have the urethral sponge and the Skene’s glands, and together we can call it the g-spot. To make matters more confusing, the Skene’s glands can excrete fluid during arousal and orgasm - this is called squirting or “female” ejaculation. It is essentially a “female” prostate.
So know this: you cannot urinate while you are sexually aroused. If that isn’t enough to help you relax during sexual arousal, try the following:
- Make sure to pee before sexual interaction (either sex with others or masturbation)
- Try masturbating in the tub when no one else is home. Don’t bother filling it up, just know that you are not going to make a mess even if you do pee.
- Bear down (almost like you’re trying to pee) during stimulation, and see what happens. Experiment in the tub.
- If fluid does leave your urethra during arousal or orgasm, take the plunge and smell it. Does it smell like pee? Most likely it is not pee, and instead it is “female” ejaculate. It can be clear and does not spell like pee.
As far as only being able to rub yourself through your undies - that’s no problem at all! Many people have very sensitive clitorises, and going straight for the clitoris when masturbating can be painful and uncomfortable. If you wanted to try masturbating without your undies on, you could try getting yourself warmed up as you normally do, and then removing them and trying from there. However, there’s no reason to do so except if you want to.
LOVE the diagrams. Good, sexy, nerdy stuff!